It’s Official: People Can Only Visit Me if They Come Bearing Food

Usually I’ve been very open to being hostess. I like it very much for many reasons. First, I don’t have to get out of my pajamas if I don’t feel like it. Second, I don’t have pesky travel time to worry about. And third, I can kick irritating people out if they irritate me (this one has never happened as of yet, but just in case my life ever becomes an episode of The Real Housewives of Anywhere, I’d like to think it’s a possibility).

However, upon my parents coming over last week and bringing with them Peters’ Drive-In, I’ve reassessed my entire life. Not only is life better when I’m drinking a milkshake and eating a burger, people are also much more likeable when they’re holding a burger and a milkshake intended for me. Therefore, it’s really a win-win situation. I will be nicer to people who arrive at my door and I will get to eat delicious food while being able to remain inside, on my couch, in my pajamas, like the lazy person I am.

Every time I go to Peters’ (or have it brought to my doorstep), I attempt to venture out. It was my goal to try a different flavour of milkshake every time I went, but that fell apart. Seeing as I don’t go very frequently (this year I’ve been twice and it’s the most I’ve ever gone in a year) on account of the fact that I really probably would allow myself to get addicted and grotesquely obese, I want to make sure that when I do go, I get the very best possible outcome. Thus, I always seem to order a Mocha Oreo Milkshake and a single cheeseburger.

Don’t get me wrong, I have tried other milkshake flavours, whether they were my own or a friend’s (the Strawberry is Heaven, Banana is delicious, plain Mocha is good, as is plain Oreo, Cherry Chocolate is awesome, and good old-fashioned Vanilla and Chocolate are to die for), but the Mocha Oreo just sits best with me. So good. I’ve also, of course, had cheese dogs, french fries (order the small!), onion rings, and various sundaes. I’m basically a Peters’ connoisseur, even though (despite having grown up in Calgary all my life) I had only ever been for the first time when I was 20. I’ve had some catching up to do, I can tell you that much.

So the moral of the story today, kids? Bring me food if you want to visit me. It will make life much better overall. I like ice cream, cheesecake, sushi, and burritos. Also, eat at Peters’ Drive-In. Order a milkshake. You won’t regret it.

Peters' Drive-in on Urbanspoon

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